Where’s your second seed? 🌾
↩️UNFOLLOW University — November 10, 2023
Happy Friday,
This one meeting would change everything.
After months of back and forth, I finally got an appointment with a retail brand that would save my struggling marketing agency. Just one “yes” would make the difference between making or missing payroll.
I had already cashed out my 401(k) and maxed out my credit cards. I used my last $500 to travel to Florida for the presentation.
“God answers prayers,” I said to myself, as I boarded the flight.
Instead of being a miracle, the meeting was a complete waste of time and money. Now I had neither. One week later, the unthinkable happened. I was dead broke.
Just 3 years after following my dreams, I sat devastated as they burned to the ground. I didn’t want to die. But I also didn’t see much reason for being alive. If my business was a failure then I was too.
My girlfriend at the time offered a portion of her teacher’s salary to help keep my dream alive but my pride had to draw the line somewhere. So I assembled just enough courage to ask my father for the $1,278.25 I needed to make it 1 more month.
👨🏽💻 Weeks later, I got a call from a former boss about a social media job I was wholly unqualified for. I said yes.
💍 Months later, I proposed to that generous teacher at her elementary school. Alisha said yes. [click to witness what it’s like to have 50 first graders help you get hitched]
🚪 Years later, the people I met along the path to failure would open the very doors to every single opportunity I had since.
🪞 A decade later, the doubt, debt and depression that nearly cost me everything have become valuable lessons. Pain is a powerful mirror if you’re willing to look.
Everyone tells you to “fail fast” but no one tells you what to do the next day when failure becomes a reality.
I wish someone had told me to look for the second seed.
🤯 Radical Truth
You can’t always choose your options but you always have a choice.
I assumed the word “aftermath” was a military term for horrible conditions after harmful events. Aftermath is what happens after wars, layoffs, divorces, storms, tragedies and accidents. Aftermath always sucks.
But the word aftermath means “after crop.” It refers to a second crop of grass after the first has been harvested, cut or taken away.
Aftermath is the seed that grows next.
In my aftermath, I asked my father for a loan, cobbled together some small projects and ended up finding new clients. This led to a new job that changed the direction of my entire life. My second seed was my choice.
That wasn’t the last aftermath I’d ever face, and I’m confident there are many more in the future. As I celebrate my first week in an exciting new role, I can clearly see the second seeds all around. What a privilege it is to have a second chance to keep growing.
There is always a second seed after the first thing has been removed. Even when I can’t control the situation, I control the seeds I plant afterward.
My wife, Alisha, and I at Caleb’s opening night theater performance.
This week, I was so proud of my son, Caleb, as he performed in his first school theater production. After 3 rounds of intense auditions, he didn’t get the part he wanted.
Undeterred, Caleb doubled down on his part in the ensemble cast and supported all his friends and classmates. He practiced for 150 hours over 2 months. Disappointment made him more determined, not less.
I’d love to think he gets it from his father but this is a newsletter about courageous truth. 😬
Once you stop to look for second seeds you can see them everywhere, and sometimes, in everyone.
⚡️Courageous Question
What remains? Where is the second seed you may have ignored?
🗣 Wonderful Words
“God will allow you to remain in the wilderness as long as you need to in order to teach you exactly what you need. Trust Him.”
🙏🏽 Prayer Package
God, sometimes the darkness of doubt is louder than the light of truth. When pain makes it hard to see your plan, help me remember you are a compassionate Father, not a controlling boss. You keep your promises even when I don’t. Thank you for second chances. Amen.
🎵 Because of You - Tamia
🛠 Practical Tool
Driving at night can be four times deadlier than daytime because of decreased visibility and increased driver error. Leading change during uncertainty can be just as treacherous, especially if you're unprepared or overdependent on familiar tools.
In this “oldie but goodie” podcast episode, Leading in the Dark, Daryl and I offer stories, learnings and failures from the frontlines of budget cuts, bankruptcy & layoffs and other crises that can make or break a business.
How do you build a high-trust team in times of low visibility? Are there really proven principles we can use to navigate unproven times? We think so. Sometimes the 3 most powerful words are "I need help."
Thanks for the sharing, support and encouragement! Thanks for the sharing, support and encouragement! I’m grateful for this community of courageous leaders who aren’t afraid to succeed differently.
You can learn more about my story here or check out my previous posts.
See you next UNFOLLOW Friday!
Sign up for the ↩️Unfollow University newsletter
Every Friday I’ll send you 5 courageous ideas to help you redesign your work life by making better career decisions:
🤯 Radical Truth - A story from me
⚡️ Courageous Question - A challenge for you
🗣 Wonderful Words - A quote worth remembering
🙏🏽 Prayer Package - A moment of meditation
🛠 Practical Tool - An actionable resource
